4 days of no ear-entropy

Last Sunday I dipped inside a waterfall and later while trekking back from the place, I passed through a rainy forest for two hours in constant. I walked amid nature. But most often I was only watching my footstep as it was slippery. I reminded myself to stand a while and look up towards the cloudy sky, and drink the dancing green that was surrounding. Rainy season is a blessing indeed. I crossed pools of water and overflowing mini-waterfalls.. Driving back home took more 5 hours and yeah that’s it. I was home. I felt safe. I was ok.

The other day I went to the office and I had a pretty long day there. I was happy & tired. But I came back to my place with a tiny stuffed ear. I mean I was feeling as if my ears are swelled. I felt like cleaning it with a earbud. I did. I cleaned well. It’s a habit to keep the ear clean. I forgot the moment and got busied in the later life. After 2 hours, when I was about to fall asleep, I had pain in the left ear. I could not sleep with it. I had to wait to let it go. I tried to close my eyes and still, it bothered me. I did not sleep for more half an hour. I thought that I need rest. My body might need rest. I slept with no plans. I must rest and so did I. I woke up after an 8 hour sleep to understand that the thing is not over yet. It had only began. It was distressing. I used the earbud again. I cleaned it, and to my surprise, again little wax. Normally it wont come in such a short interval, that too when I was placed indoor. There was pain. Human's body is a cobweb of secret. I must say I am illiterate about this biology..

I knew something was wrong. I remember the first dip in the water when a gush of water had hit the ear. I discontinued a little, but then I bathed soundly. That was it. I needed to see someone. I dressed up to go to the office. It was 9 AM. All local clinics were shut. I felt pain. I chose to take the local train than riding my bike to the work. I walked with a partial sound in one ear. It was funny too. I consulted a medical shop and got myself an eardrop. By the time my work was over, I knew I need to see the doctor. I went to the hospital, and another clinic, and another again, all but without doctor, or I had no prefixed appointment. Okay. What is this? What is the matter with the big city. I was supported by a friend who consulted me with an online doc, and I was given a course. I came to know that I must not use the earbud. I should not insert the finger inside ear. I should protect the ear. There is swelling. I have a colder voice. I was little feverish. I bought medicine and came back home.

I learnt what’s it like to live with a partial hearing. I closed my eyes and it all felt dreamy. The life around one is a cinema without the sound, and who am I? I was humbled by my reduced capability. Will it impact my ambitions? I saw a blind man walking across the road with a stick tapping on the ground. What’s it like to never be able to see the colors, and human figures around one and the sky and the colorless water… What’s it like to not be able to see oneself dressing handsomely. What’s it like to don’t know how ones face look like. It’s all strange. What is this thought. I had asked doctor should I be worried. She replied, “No”.

I took medicine. I felt pain. I used the eardrop. I was hopeful. Another day I worked from home. I received phone calls from one ear. I talked with a heavy voice. I understood that to be home and to be able to take care of yourself is a blessing. I am privileged. What are those people who have to go to work no matter what. What is this life? Some are different than others. Many of us are many different people. I spoke with a friend and discussed that I am grateful for things that I always take for granted. I have things that I forget how easily they have been in my life and I have never specifically felt happy about it. “NEVER”. More two days I pretended around people that I am okay. I pretended that I have listened to what they have said, and I knew that I had to ask again. This healed a little the fourth day. I felt better. The stuffed ear feeling was gone. I was a little free. I was able to listen better. I was coming back to normal…

Normal is a blessing..